I turn 30 in three weeks from today and boy have I learned a lot of things in these (almost) 30 years! Mostly, lessons learned the hard way. Is there any other way? (((sigh)))
I can tell you though that many of these lessons often came with huge beneficial gains for me mentally, physically and spiritually. Yet, sadly, sometimes it took learning some hard lessons more than once to really grasp the calamity of it all.
However, as I am quickly approaching thirty and getting ready to leave my twenties behind, I find it’s the perfect opportunity to reflect on who I am as a person and just how far I have come from that young woman who entered into her twenties a decade ago.
So many lessons learned over these past three decades that I have been blessed to be alive, but in the spirit of “30”, here are thirty life lessons that really made a difference in who I am today and might help you going through something similar at your current stage in life.
1.) It’s okay to say no – Those who truly respect and love you will understand.
2.) Get to know the real you – Take time to get to know who you really are. What are your likes, dislikes, goals, dreams. Not just what everyone else is doing. You do you! Trust me, it will pay off!
3.) You cannot make everyone happy – Trying to do so will only bring yourself misery. Not everyone will like you. They aren’t supposed to, and that’s okay!
4.) Having boundaries does not make you bad – It’s quite healthy and necessary and those who have issues with your boundaries do not respect you.
5.) Stand up for yourself – No one else can do it for you and if it costs you certain friendships, jobs or opportunities, then they weren’t worth your peace or your time to begin with.
6.) Forgive others – It’s not for them anyways, its for you and your peace!
7.) Don’t participate in toxic relationships – People will only treat you to the extent of how far you allow them. True friendships and relationships are mutually funded.
8.) Perfection does not exist – Trying to keep up with the Jones’s will only be a waste of your own good life. No one is perfect!
9.) True happiness is not found in material things – Having a nice house and a flashy car is wonderful, but don’t let your self-worth get wrapped up in what big or small material items that you do or do not possess.
10.) Change is inevitable – You can either embrace it or fight it, but change will come regardless and sometimes it can be a beautiful thing!
11.) Be the bigger person – You cannot make everyone see your side of things or your perspective, whether right or wrong. Make peace with it and move on.
12.) Everyone makes mistakes – It’s part of life to make mistakes, but learning from them is a choice.
13.) Invest in your skin – Sure, a tan looks great, but healthy skin looks better! Invest in a proper day and night skin care regimen and your body will thank you for it.
14.) Diet & exercise do matter – Never underestimate how important diet and exercise can be for your health. Although, great for your body, it’s also beneficial to your mind.
15.) Sleep, sleep, sleep – As a life long insomniac this has been a hard lesson for me. Sleep is one of the most crucially important tools in your life and also one of which that controls many more mental and physical functions to boot. So, get that rest! Zzzzz…
16.) Knowledge is power – I say this with absolute humble intention. Reading is not something to do when you’re “bored”. Learning is crucial to your mental development. You’re never too old to learn something new. Now, get out there and explore!
17.) Do not conform – You were born to stand out with your own unique talents. Embrace them! Show your gifts to the world and inspire others to do the same.
18.) Not everyone is your friend – Not everyone who says they’re your friend is truly your friend. Some people seek only to bring you down to elevate themselves and weeding them out can sometimes be a heartbreaking but necessary experience in life.
19.) You cannot control everything – Go ahead and give up that fantasy notion on being able to control every outcome. Learning to accept things in life especially difficult things is a hard but necessary life experience that everyone has to go through. Take what you learned from that experience and use it to your advantage the next time you’re approached with a similar opportunity and you will be all the wiser for it.
20.) Enjoy the little/simple things in life – It really is those simple moments in life that you will look back on and remember. Not that expensive purchase you made or that big promotion. It’s almost always a special dinner reservation with your significant other or family member. Or a simple and totally unexpected gift you will always cherish not because of its monetary worth, but the intrinsic value in which it holds! No one has ever been able to put a price on something I hold dear with sentimental value.
21.) Stop planning and just do it – Another hard lesson for me being the natural planner that I am and my love to make a map and list for everything, is just do it! Sometimes you simply can’t plan for everything and coming to terms with this can eliminate your need for control and devastation when the outcome isn’t as you expected. Life is passing you by minute by minute, make the most of it and just do it!
22.) Make peace with your past – Everyone has a past and everyone has things in their past that they may not be particularly proud of. Forgive yourself for not knowing better at the time. You had to have lived what you did in order to know what you do now.
23.) Laugh every chance you get – Life is too short to be anything less than happy. Laugh as often as you can. Experience the silly and free side of life. It costs nothing to laugh and its good for your soul.
24.) Take pictures, but don’t forget to live in the moment – It’s important for me as a mother to capture pictures and video of my children every chance I get. Literally to the point of them thinking, oh my gosh another picture. It’s also equally important for you to be a part of those memories with your children or friends and family. So snap your pic if you must, but then join the fun!
25.) True character always reveals itself – People will always show you who they really are. Just pay attention to how they treat you or respond to you. If they’re always tearing you down to lift their own ego or agenda, then they’re toxic and need to go!
26.) Respect is earned – This may conflict with some peoples standards, but for me respect is earned. I will respect someones good heart and hard work in life, but to truly respect someone is more than just a word. It’s also a mutually invested concept and feeling. Example: Would you automatically respect someone who held no regard or respect for you? Of course not! My point exactly. Respect. Is. Earned.
27.) Take the risk and go for it – Apply for that job you’ve always wanted or better yet become your own boss if that’s your dream. You will never get anywhere in life if you just sit on the sidelines doing nothing and being scared of what could go wrong. Go for it!
28.) Be yourself – Be the true authentic version of yourself. Let others get to know the fun, quirky, creative and amazing person that you are. Those flaws that you may be so insecure over may inspire others to have the needed confidence to reach out and inspire someone else as well. Be yourself! Everyone else is already taken. You are the only you and that is your power!
29.) Don’t take criticism to heart – Especially from those who mean it to harm you or try and belittle you. The issue doesn’t lie with you, it’s their insecurities they need to deal with. Show them kindness and compassion and do not respond with ill intentions. Throwing gas on a fire has never solved anything. Take the high road!
30.) Do accept constructive criticism from the wise – It took me many years of having to do things “my way” and failing over and over before realizing that there are some people who truly have your best interest at heart and have only good intentions with helping you by sharing their wisdom and insight on lessons they too learned after many failed attempts in their own lives.
I hope this list helps you in some way and I would love to hear what life lesson’s you have learned. The good and bad…Leave a comment or send me an email!
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